Friday, January 31, 2014

January Wall Quotes

Here's a recap of the latest work sayings that made it on "The Wall".

What's that beeping? (it's me) We're going to call you G-3P0 from now on. 
I'd be Cap'n Crunch... cause I like the hat. 
What's that pregnancy hormone? THC?
Teamwork makes the dream work!
And then I came out of the closet...
Love is like a fart. If you have to push it, it's probably s**t. 
Can I tell you how much fun I has taking out your balls and playing with them?

If it burns when you pee, you gotta stop.
(singing) I second that emulsion!
I look much, much better when I have a bra on.
(How to make a flow chart for labor) PUSH! Did it come out? NO. PUSH! Did it come out? NO.
Sorry, but I'm not the only person in this room who's had a penis in his mouth. 
(Turning on the screen saver to a fireside scene.) I figuratively, and quite literally, keep the fire going!
Being pregnant is like being stoned 24/7 with the munchies.
It's like the Last Supper! But with less dying. 

That smells great! What is that?
Island Nectar.
Eyelid nectar?
Eyelid nectar, the tears of god...

I knew something in the milk ain't clean!
(singing) Feeling Grube!
No, it's in there but you're going to push it to the side. 
They could get lei'd!
I'ma be his Christian Grey!
You have it in your mouth, but you're probably going to spit it out...
That's why you need to be friends with Barbara and get access to her secret closet.
It was like 50 shades of Don.
Of all the women's shoes I've tried on, those are the most comfortable. 

Frito-Lay Submission - Do Us A Flavor

My suggestion for a new Frito-Lay flavor isn't getting any traction or votes. 
I wonder why?

I thought it was better than this one...

Though technically, they might be the same thing?

But come on! NOW you're just being silly.

Thursday, January 30, 2014


Rock on! Totes McCoates made us a logo for the burger tour!  Now we just need Scro to select the next restaurant. (I think it's a Scro / Breet kind of thing ... so likely have to wait until the team returns from Cleveland.)

What do you think?

Alrighty then.

A few definitely said yes, but most hedged; and it was clear that the majority simply didn't resonate to the word success.

This was taken from The New Elite by Taylor, Harrison and Kraus. 

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Real Work Convo, Part 12414:

It all started with a conversation that I was not a part of... 

Email from a male teammate to the whole team:

For all of you who were poking fun at me yesterday regarding my dry hands.  Forever Midnight is a real collection with legitimate triple moisture cream from Bath and Body Works.  My wife tells me, it ended up in our bathroom cabinet because a few years back it was a gift from a distance family member. 
I don’t know much about cream….but I can say it didn’t do a very good job.
Also I forgot to tell you…it smells horrible.  Not to mention the name Forever Midnight is terrible.

Response from McCoates:

Sounds like a name for a Victoria Secret line.

Response from me:

No, I’m going to go with Harlequin Romance. 

What do you think?

Monday, January 27, 2014

Music Monday - Digital Witness by St. Vincent

Here's a great song to start off your week!

The new album comes out in February.

Friday, January 24, 2014


Tom* decided that the Lunch Bunch needed a new 2014 dining goal.  As such, he cultivated a list from of the top locally owned, non-chain, minimum four star burger spots in Richardson.  This would be called THE MAGICAL MYSTERY BURGER TOUR!  The first on the list … Haystack Burgers off Belt Line and the 75. (Yes, I still say “the” before a freeway number. It’s the SoCal girl in me.)

It was an incredibly cold and windy day, so the first joke out of our mouths was whether we should eat on the patio.  It was decent sized and I’m sure lovely on a Spring day, but definitely not today.  We walked in and were greeted with a great atmosphere. Woodsy counter tops, paintings on the walls of goats, fake boar heads, steel/aluminum chair rails and funky green chandeliers (you gotta get yourself a shan-da-leeer! Like this one! Or dat one!)

Instead of ordering “The Haystack”, their specialty which comes with onions, cheddar cheese, applewood smoked bacon, BBQ sauce and the usual burger fixings (just say no to BBQ sauce), I decided to build my own.  This monstrosity, here forth known as “The G”, included avocado, Swiss cheese, haystack onions, bacon, and all the fixings. I also included a side order of haystack onions and fries, what they call the “Half/Half”, to be shared with Pintrish (formally known as Trish the Dish). Also, they have a very long and diverse beer list, but I couldn’t read it all in time.  Looks like they have a good selection on tap too.

We collected our drinks (note they have Cherry Coke!)  along with CLOTH napkins and a choice of regular or chipotle ketchup. I was very excited about the large cloth napkins.  Used one on my lap and one as a bib; the chances of me spilling something on my chest are very, very great. They have that really cool slush/crunch ice, but the straws are a little too skinny and get clogged by the ice quickly. But that is acceptable because the seating allows for individual or large groups, so you can easily accommodate 2 or 7 in your party.

The food arrived.  Pintrish and I mao-ed on the fries and haystack onions; these came with a spicy ranch and a dip that is similar to what you’d find with blooming onions. 

I cut my burger in half because it was too big and clumsy for me to eat whole. Terribly delicious and prepared at a perfect medium. I finished the whole thing (sorry diet) and had a pleasant food belly – not burger coma.

All in all, fantastic place and will come back for more! Next time with BEER!

Ambiance – 7 (a little bit eclectic and modern at the same time.)
Burger – 8
Cleanliness – 8
Drinks – 8
Location -8
Misc. – 10 (CLOTH NAPKINS!)
Restroom – 5 (did not visit the restroom so I’m giving it an average.)
Sides – 7 (was not a huge fan of the onions or fried pickles that Laura got. The fries were okay.)
Staff – 8 (friendly, family owned)

Bonus points - 5 (good usage of promoting their social media and with a discount!)
 TOTAL SCORE: 74 of a possible 100. 

I may revisit this score based on the rest of the burger joints on the tour.  Especially as I am sure their restroom was fine and we all really enjoyed ourselves.

Right now, we just need Andy to come up with our logo for THE MAGICAL MYSTERY BURGER TOUR!… get on it Andy!

*Who picked up the new nickname "Scro" at lunch. Confidentiality clauses and non-disclosure agreements prevent me from revealing why. 

Monday, January 20, 2014

Music Monday - "A Little Respect" by Erasure

True story.

I was a freshman in high school, only 14 years old, and had a crush on our marching band's 2nd Drum Major*, Kurt Aufderheide. He was blonde, blue-eyed, tall and Mormon. (Now that I think about it, I had a thing for blondes in high school.)  I do not think that I ever had a real conversation with Kurt; he was a senior like my brother and ate lunch on the upper quad, whereas I was with all the other freshmen by our lockers, too scared to leave the safety of a mass group.

One afternoon, I called our local pop radio station, Star 100.7, and requested that they play a song.  The conversation went something like this:

DJ: Star 100.7! Who is this?
Me: Ummm. Glynis?
DJ: Hey Gwyneth, what's going on?
Me: Uhhh, can you play a song for me? A Little Respect by Erasure?
DJ: Sure thing, who do you want to dedicate this too?
Me: (not expecting this) Oh, um? Kurt Aufderhide? *stunned that this came out of my mouth*
DJ: Ooo! Is this your boyfriend?
Me: NO!!!
DJ: Well does he have your number?
Me: I'm sure he can figure out where to get it.
DJ: Alright then! Here's Erasure with "A Little Respect" going out to Kurt Aufderheide from Gwyneth!

Even though the DJ called me Gwyneth, everyone knew it was me. Didn't matter though because I taped it onto a cassette (did you know they record those conversations during the commercials, not live?) and planed to give that tape to Kurt.

The next day at school, I got up the nerve to take the tape to Kurt (I think my phone number was written on the outside.) He was surrounded by a bunch of girls and somehow I got the nerve to break in and give him the tape, say a squeeky "Hi!" and run away.

He never called.

And I think he got a Mormon girlfriend a few weeks later. She was blonde, blue-eyed and played the trumpet. AND A FRESHMAN!

Where's Kurt today?
In Baghdad. Being awesome. Getting awards. And political stuff. Working on labor issues and probably solving world hunger.

Jets for the 0.01%.
Living the dream!

We won Tournament of Champions that year. 1992 Field Show. And if you don't believe how awesome marching band can be, you gotta check out this video... of us... THE EMERALD BRIGADE!

*The 2nd Drum Major is at the back of the field, so that when you march facing away from the front, you can still keep in time. 

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Belated Music Monday - What Time Is It? by The Spin Doctors

I need to stop making a habit of belated Music Mondays.  Sorry my three readers, I'll try to do better next week.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Belated Music Monday - "Reflektor" by Arcade Fire

You know when you have a project and you're procrastinating because you are not really in the mood (nor will you EVER be in the mood,for that matter) to complete the task at hand, so you play around on YouTube for a bit, watching videos and then suddenly stumble upon a song that you meant to download (legally) a few months back and never seemed to get around to doing so?

It's just a reflektor.