Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Workout Wednesday report

Whelp, today is Wednesday. I haven't worked out since Sunday. Feeling bloated and lacking energy. This weekend I will have a chance to walk the beaches of California, so that's good. Amazon Amy kicked my arse in the last few workouts, I deserved the punishment. Not much to report. Got a lot on my mind and I don't want to express in a public forum. But I do want to say, to the person who told me a secret earlier, and you know how I hate secrets, I want to say that I am very happy for you. Enjoy the adventure.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Music Monday - Rogue Wave & Stephen Malkmus

Just in time. A creature-double-feature for your entertainment.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Irritations and aggrivations

While trying to quit smoking, these are the topics which have set off shouting matches at the abode:

Toothpicks left on the counter
Bad drivers at Sprouts parking lot
Misplacing a drivers license
Getting a video to load on the MacBook
Walking out of the room while still talking
Bandaid wrappers on the floor
Washing whites with colors
Why we are watching the end of a depressing movie
How to properly do an ab exercise
Where to hang a painting
Whether the painting was level
The handle of a gladiator sword
Two bank of America cards

That's what we have argued over in two days.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

In my noggin

I really want a hunk of sourdough bread and some Brie.
Why does Moocha Poocha Chubby Wubby Fat Boy like to lick his feet?
I never had a locker like you see on Glee.
Why can't my colleagues break out into song?
I guess we will go with a cabinet reface.
You call that an earthquake?
Really should listen to NPR and find out about this Libya thing.
Wendy's fries are pretty awesome, but not as good as McDs.
I am NOT seeing that Contagion flick.
Guess we need to build a bunker.
A woman in that skirt and heels doesn't work on her feet all day.
Jason Statham, yum.
That's a Brooks Brothers polo shirt.
Mark Saling really does look like Robbie Williams.
I hate bullies
Show me a real woman in that ad, not a stick.
Who invented high heel shoes?
How old is Cloris Leachman?

Monday, August 22, 2011

Music Monday: Quiet Please by Galactic

Press play. Before you read, press play

So let's talk about "the line" shall we? I don't mean The Man in Black, walking the line; I'm talking about when you realize that things have to change. The moment when you take a good, hard look at what you want, what you expect for your future, what you want to accomplish, where you expect yourself to be (and who is in it) and decide, unreservedly, that this is the absolute moment where you draw a line.
Putting into the parlance of our times; I'll use a situation, just for sh*** and giggles.

Think of someone from your past. You come across that person and get excited to speak with them again. So you do. You strike up a friendly email conversation. Witty banter spreads across the miles. Inside jokes. Great music swapped. Remembrances of moments at 4 am where you cannot believe you are still awake, but do not want the night to end. Road trips, both memorable in their uniqueness and frustrating in the honesty of what will come. Trust. Honesty. Games... oh, the games that are played. You think back on this time in your life and feel a rush of... youth and longing. Excitement. Adrenaline for what you would do now, if you had a chance to go back then.

You know that if you just pick up the phone, that person will be there like no time has past. The connection resumes. You have that opportunity. You know it. They know it. It's an awesome and stunning moment. Like when a wave peaks at its crest and the sun hits it perfectly.

So you take a tentative step into the water, dip a toe as it were. And you slowly come to realize, it's all a dream; like a mirage in the desert as you slowly walk to your dying thirst, out of the frying pan and into the fire. It's a moment in time, a figment in your head of that time in space where you were at your best, they were at their best, and it's illogical that you would have that moment in time again. (Insert your own thoughts into what would happen in that scenario.)

When do you accept emails? Where do you meet again in person? Drinks. What comes around, goes around, and the situation ends in tears... they always do. With just the knowledge that you can NEVER put things back together again. There is no super glue for this Humpty Dumpty.

That's the line. Right there. I'm not crossing it.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

What the frak?

Boo on you, VH1! How can you show Back to the Future part one and two, but then not air part three? Srsly? I can't watch just a portion of a trilogy... imagine watching Star Wars four and five without the resolution in six? (Though you wouldn't have to see the ewoks, but I like ewoks, I hate JarJar Binks.) Bad VH1, go to the corner for a timeout.

Why am I up at 4:20 am

Dude, I'm awake and shouldn't be. Blargety Blarg Blarg. And this pic makes me look like i have cross-eyes... which I do, at 4:20 in the morning.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Workout Wednesday Report : BOOYAH!

Incredibly and wonderfully proud of myself. After three months of workouts with Amazon Amy, including cardio and diet modification, I have lost 12% body fat.
Ya, srsly.

Tuesday, August 16th was the official 12 week measurement with the caliper and tape. Each time Amy took a body measurement, she would giggle and make weird happy noises.
“What is it?!”
“Oh, it’s good, you’ll see!”

So when she stepped back after all the prodding, twenty measurements taken from my neck all the way to my calves, I was anxious to hear the results.

I went from 46% to 34% body fat in three months. Now, my weight has only dropped by ten pounds, but that due to the muscle that I have put on in place of all the fat. According to the measures, I have 157 pounds in lean mass and about 75 pounds in fat. So there you go. I’m shooting for another ten pounds lost by October 11th (which is coincidentally, the day before I leave on vacation in the Bahamas.)

Monday, August 15, 2011

Music Monday - Full on double rainbow, all the way

Couldn't help myself. Especially after today's woot shirt (which, yes, I did purchase it.) The best part of this song is 1:32 in.

Monday, August 8, 2011

A Year in Quotes

Names and identifying details have been removed to protect the guilty.

“I’m sorry, you’re in Connecticut. We can’t help you.”
“It’s liberating not caring, it’s kinda like being drunk, all the time.”
“I’m giving you a mental hug in a totally work appropriate way.”
“I did a lot of queer stuff when I was young.”
“Some ‘I love myself’ action”
“I played with him over the weekend. He was the Doctor. I was the patient. I feel violated.”
“The words you’ve never heard before: The hot new tuba player”
“We are the reason that man had three nips.”
“Oh, that explains why you rub my coat!”
“This is what happens when you drink a lot in the afternoon and type things”
“The Galapagos? Isn’t that where Darwin studied toilets?”
“It always goes to my junk.”
“He is getting a lot out of us today.” … “That’s okay, he got a lot outta me yesterday.”
“Communism works…. In theory”
“It was then that I learned I was 24 hours of losing my big toe.”
“The primary thrust that he is trying to penetrate… to not be straddled”
“If you don’t then call me at home and I’ll whip it out.”
“You’re still looking for squishy leather, right?”
“Dudes are like… strong!”
“I ran over a bunny with my lawn mower once, can you top that?”
“Were you smoking crack this morning?” … “Well, she’s the closest thing to it.”
“Chains are good.”
“I’m going to Target to buy a breast pump.”
“Cricket and Birdie… and, wait for it… Maude.”
“I feel worse drinking a dead man’s Boost than wearing his shoes.”
“Thank you for your little boom boom.”
“Be sure to get extra nipples!”
“I actually prefer them smaller… I can fit them all in my hand.”
“He’s like a Chihuahua on crack.”
“That is too hard for the softness that is inside.”
“Creepy never left”
“The ball is larger and brighter and bigger and bright red”
“We’re Canadian, not Al Qaida!”
“She sent me a Time magazine that said ‘Gay is Ok!’ on the cover that summer,. I kept it. Cause she died. And that was the last thing she sent to me.”
“Gee, I hope that was chocolate.”

Music Monday - Bringing sparkle back with Rock DJ by Robbie Williams

You know how you are in your car, behind another car, waiting at a light to make a left hand turn? Well, I have this thing where I try to synchronize my indicator clicks (tick tick tick tick) to match up with the rear light flashing on the car in front of me (on off on off). I've never heard anyone else admit to doing this, maybe I'm weird.

When I had my VW Bug it appeared to work best on other European cars, which isn’t that surprising. While I couldn’t get it right, it came very close and even matched a few times before falling out of pattern. Those small moments of triumph made my day. Of course now I have my Nissan Cube, Super Gus the Hippie Bus, in which everything old is new again.

This morning, I was behind another manufactured-in-Asia car leaving the Tom Thumb parking lot (thanks for the espresso con panna Ted!) Without even trying, I flicked on my indicator (X calls it a clicker) and perfectly matched with the car in front of me. I couldn’t believe it. Didn’t even TRY to match it and it came out PERFECT! I mean, those clicks and flashes were in perfect harmony.

Since the day started so fortuitously, I shall end it just as awesomely. I'm going to get me some bath salts, chocolate strawberries, a lottery ticket and watch me some RW.

Best part? Two minutes in with the wink 'n a grin.

Friday, August 5, 2011


Going to be hilarious yo.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Three Dudes Doing Stuff

From right to left... Utah, Adame and Dimples McGee. Keep on rocking in the free world Gents, you're a class act!

Monday, August 1, 2011

What I Learned Today - Month of July

Tony Danza was the Italian dude in Taxi.
If you are crossing the border into Mexico, check your trunk.
Berkshire Hathaway owns Ben Bridge Jewelers.*
I actually know someone who has ONLY seen Star Wars episode 4.
Pictures of the esophagus are gross.
The Panama Canal lock system,
*And Dairy Queen, See's Candie's and GEICO.
Namakaran naming ceremony is traditionally how Hindu babies get their names.
Gopee = protector of cows
Suriname is in South America, not Africa.
No one will steal broccoli from the work fridge.
A narwhal is a toothed whale in the Arctic.
Madam, I'm Adam (it's a palindrome.)
Raison d'ĂȘtre = reason for existence.
McDonald's does NOT own Chipoodle.
Indian style is taboo, it's now Criss Cross Applesauce
Top baby names in 2010 were Jacob & Isabella.
A sneeze before breakfast leads to good things.
I know someone who hasn't seen any Twilight movie or read the books.

Music Monday - R.X. Bertoldi & Ray Lamontagne

I WOULD share a fantastic song from a gifted singer/songwriter R.X. Bertoldi... I WOULD share it, but R.X. "Bob" Bertoldi has disabled embedded videos on his youtube channel. My assumption is that he doesn't want people lifting a free song by using a web to mp3 converter. Hey "Bob" Bertoldi, I'm going to buy your song legitimately from iTunes or where ever you have it for sale, and I'm going to check out your other stuff too, but kind of a bummer that I can't share your lovely melody and attention grabbing voice with my three readers. However, I must say, Mister Bertoldi you have a lovely chapeau and your name reminds me of a great bowl of Shrimp Alfredo... mmm. Noms.
That being said, please copy/paste the link below into a new browser and check him out. Good stuff.

So I'm going to throw up another option below. I'm not really familiar with Ray Lamontagne, he's pretty groovy and not too Jack Johnsony, but still a hepcat for the hipsters. Dig it.