Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Tie Tuesday - The one with all the bloops

I’m back in the world where no one wears a tie on Tuesday. I’m utterly unhip, which makes me hip, so rock on with my hipness! Here’s me, outside Leslie’s cube, enjoying the morning.
Adame claims that he doesn’t participate in Tie Tuesday anymore because he doesn’t want to iron a shirt. Quite believable, but the truth is probably more along the lines of wanting to be cool with the Gigantor crowd. Whatevs.

Up close and personal. This Brioni tie is pretty flippin’ sweet. It’s got splotches all over it… I call them bloops. Got quite a few complements on the color. Check out the bloops and bleeps. Super bloopy!

Where I stand right now is trying to determine whether I should sell off the hundreds of ties or continue to hold on to them. I wonder where I would sell them anyway. Ebay? Consignment shop?

Monday, January 30, 2012

Music Monday – R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Can she rock a purple suit, or can she rock a purple suit!?

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Hubster Gets All Painty

A few days ago, Hubster reached out to a gallery to see what the process is for submission. He's been painting for a while and building up a collection of work. Thanks to my former colleague for selling us his awesome giant easel, it's been fantastic not to have my desk covered in oil splatter. The previous three sentences are disjointed thoughts, but basically, he wants to see if his hobby could turn into something more. The gallery requested images, and then ANOTHER gallery called him out of the blue requesting to see his work. Kind of exciting!

So Devo came over today to take some digital shots (THANKS DEVO!) He has a disk ready and we'll see what happens. A lot of his work are beach scenes and then apocalyptic imagery. Perhaps Hubster needs to find a way to incorporate the two?

Thought I would share.

Got so much love and even more theories

Was standing in the shower, rinsing the conditioner from my hair, and thought about how absurdly blessed I am that I was born in the US where a shower and conditioner is even available. How a majority of people in Africa have to fight for drinking water, let alone enough to be luxuriously letting a wave float over their hair and back. I'm so flipping lucky and I take it for granted. Bad G.

And then I sit at Book Club where I am spouting ridiculous theories to my peeps about why I can't take up photography because I have a dear friend who also takes pictures and I wouldn't want to infringe on her hobby. The dim sum waiters came and went, the conversation continued, and still I was reminded of my blessings in life.

I have it good. Amazingly good. I'm happy and have love all around me. So when I am dark and feeling blue, I need to remember those things.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Tie Tuesday - So uncool, but not yet cool again

Yep. Tie Tuesday is dead. My last bastion of support, Adame, has officially fallen off the wagon. Last week I had an inkling, but today it's official. So now we roam into the territory of when ties were uncool, new wave had died and grunge was steaming in the underground. The land of the post-tie. While I will continue to rock the house in my Brioni's, I'll await a change in atmosphere that signals its eventual return.

One would have thought with the influx of young Republican white dudes just one aisle over, that they would have embraced the trend. Too bad, so sad. I've never been one to go with the crowd.

Am officially, uncool. And uncool rules.

Monday, January 16, 2012

"Music" Monday - Video Games by Lana Del Ray

If one can call this "music" or Elizabeth Grant a "singer", I felt that the trainwreck that was a "performance" on SNL this weekend deserved to be watched, just for the sheer pain it causes.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Not red, but blue

Hubster and I were running around today getting things and I was feeling rather blue. "What's wrong baby?" he asked. I replied, "Well, I feel sort of down in the dumps today. I don't know why, I just do." and then he said something that stuck with me for a while. "You just need a new hobby, that's all."
Hmm. A new hobby. Makes sense, but what? He paints, plays games, works out, restores classic cars, goes to the shooting range, hiking when the weather is nice, jet skiing... He has plenty. But what are mine?
I like to cook, make jewelry, grow herbs and vegis, reading, knitting, gaming... But I don't know what I need to do to perk myself up. I've been working out. I already know how to play an instrument, though I havent practiced in a while. I can sew, but haven't done anything complex beyond a simple baby quilt.
I noted this to Hubs, and he commented that I need a real challenging hobby that will make me feel like I've accomplished something. But what? A language? Learn how to sail? I just don't know.... And that's part of why I feel blue today.

Business Meeting Jargon

Over the course of two and a half days, I was in meetings for work. They tend to get a little dry and I have to fight the urge not to zone out. This year, I played a little Business Meeting Bingo and kept track of repetitive jargon. Some might argue that this is in poor taste for those presenting, but it actually helped me to stay focused on the speaker's words. I present to you the results:

Private Viewing = 3 times by same person in two minutes
Work Together = 5 times in one very lengthy, run-on, sentence
Again = 4 times by same person in one minute
Work needs to be done = 5 times in one speech
Incentivize = 6 times throughout two days by different people
Um = 72+ (stopped keeping count) by same person in same speech
Touch base = Twice in one hour
Touch = 10 times in that same hour
Like that = 7 times be one person, 2 times by people asking questions back
Reports = 26+ times in fifteen minutes by three different people
Three hundred million dollars = 12+ times in same hour
Taxes = 19 times by same person in half an hour
Cogent = 3 times over the course of 2 days
At the end of the day = I counted 26, but have been told there were many more mentions

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Utah and a bunch of birds

True exchange this morning with Utah.

G: Hey Utah, teach me something about the state of Utah? I need to learn something new today.
U: What do you want to know?
G: I don't know. Are there black people in Utah?
U: Some, not much. I don't know the percentage.
G: Can you buy liquor?
U: Yes, but you have to go to the state liquor store. You can't buy beers over a certain percentage of alcohol either. I think it's like 5%. So, you have to buy high point beer at the state liquor store too. Which is why we have two kinds of Corona, one is higher than the other.
G: Wow!
U: Yup.
G: What else?
U: Oh, the state bird is the seagull and the state flower is the seagull lilly-
G: -Wait, wait, wait a minute. How can the state bird be a seagull? Utah isn't near the sea.
U: Well, when the Mormons settled in Utah back in 1847, or whatever year it was, they depended on the crops to live. And one year, a whole bunch of Mormon crickets, which are crickets, just really big crickets... anyway these crickets started eating up all the crops. Then one day, a flock of seagulls appeared-
G: - Wait, what?!
U: A flock of seagulls. (looks perplexed at me on why I am questioning this.)
G: Did the Mormons run? Did they run so far away?
U: Huh?
G: Well, you said a Flock of Seagulls appeared.
U: Oh, is it called something else? Um, a whole bunch of seagulls? Anyway, the seagulls appeared and they ate the crickets. Saving the Mormons crops and they lived, so that's why seagulls are the state bird.
G: (immediately googling the video for I Ran (So Far Away) to educate Utah about 80s music.) Um Utah, have you never heard of A Flock of Seagulls?
U: Ummmmm, from the way you're looking at me I feel like I should have. (plays video)

(Adame and Trish the Dish come over to my desk and start dancing and singing with me, Utah continues to stare at the screen confused.)
G: Don't worry Utah, I have an older brother, so I know more about 80s music than you do, maybe that's it.
U: No, I have a few older brothers...
G: Well you should text them and ask if they know who The Flock of Seagulls are.
U: No, if I did that they would think I was crazy, texting them about seagulls... (he walks off)

Well, that's what I actually learned today. Utah doesn't know who the Flock of Seagulls are.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Tie Tuesday - The Proverbial Cheese Stands Alone

No one, not one person joined me on Tie Tuesday. I suppose it's gone out of fashion now. No longer a hip trend. It came and went like the slap watch. The day the VP wore two ties to work on Tie Tuesday and called it a triple threat Tie Tuesday with Thai food for lunch... we jumped the shark.

So here's me. In a brown Brioni. All byyyyyy myyyyyyyyyyseeeeeeeelf.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Music Monday - DJ Snootchie Bootchies "You Know I Keeps a Private Jet"

Uhhh... no. No, you don't keeps a private jet. Not in Michigan you don't.
And if you're spending money, how can your wallet be fat?
I'm so confused.
But great use of Bruce Banner and kittehs.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Le sigh

Thwarted weekend as we spent time at the ER for a migraine, cleaning the house of clutter, missing wedding rings and the like. Only good output is watching Statham in The Expendables and reminiscing on Mickey Rourke circa 1985.
But the big ten year anniversary is on the 11th, with a fun weekend in store.
So there is that.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

A request to my IT Department


I previously entered a ticket because my laptop has been overheating – when I open a browser, it will make a WHOOSH noise like a fan is running and it’s overheating, the WHOOSH stays for about a minute or longer. I’m not running massive files or programs, it just happens.

Jen took my laptop and checked it out. But it’s started again. It’s whooshing on and off throughout the day.

Now, my little laptop is beeping at me. Intermittently, for absolutely no reason. Beep. Beep. I’ve rebooted it, I’ve turned off the volume, I’ve made sure that all programs are closed… no change. Beep. Beep. Beep. I’ve cleared my cache and my cookies. This tends to happen when a browser is open, just one and it doesn’t matter what site… it could be google or gilt, doesn’t make a difference. It’s bothering the cube-erhood now and my neighbors are complaining.

It will probably be Murphy’s Law that you will check it out and it will be perfect for you, but when I get it back it will WHOOSH and Beep at me. I’m afraid my laptop is possessed and it hates me. Please help.


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Tie Tuesday - The One Without Me

Utah is in a lovely pink tie, Windsor-knotted as usual, crafted by Umo Lorenzo of Italy.
Adame's Public Opion number has little beer bottles all over it.
And Dimples McGee sports a black number of unknown origin.

I was not invited to the picture as I am not wearing a traditional tie... more of a jaunty purple scarf tied in front. Boooo. (And while KelBel thinks I look cute in this picture, I think I look super cheese.)

Monday, January 2, 2012

Music Monday - Joe Cocker

To start off the year I'm going to pick a classic. I have Joe Cocker's greatest hits in my car rotation; this happens to be one of my favorites, Bye Bye Blackbird.

This one goes out to all those who are ready for a new year and the possibility of amazing opportunities.

2011 : The Wall Wrapup

Nothing good comes from condoms and woodchips.
I am Trish Farley. I can say these things.
He could be constipated for all I know.
Some people have dashing good looks, some people have hard nips. I have both.
So we keep tugging and never finish?
Kiril, come here so I can smell you.
Are you pregnant or just fat?
I’m a slutty slut.
(whispering) And we’re with a “black” guy!
Don’t you want to just touch it! – Yes, it amazes me.
I’ve gotten older with age.
I’ve give you some honey but my honey got hard
I have to use the bathroom (operated by…)
What did I learn last night? You’re much nicer when you’re drunk.
He’s screwing us with porcupine needles and no grease!
Does he whack people? – Depends on your interpretation of “whack”.
You had me at pilot.
How do you spell Pocahontas? - Very carefully.
Oh, I got a mouthful from a pilot - A mouthful of what?