Um Kat? You look like an Oompa Loompa. Chill on the spray tan.
TOP 20 INTRO DANCE
Architect of the Mind - Kerry Muzzey
What was that? Mad Men? Ooo, me likely. When is Mad Men coming back anyway? Wouldn't it be awesome if Don Draper broke out into dance? With a smoke and gin and floozy of course. The dude in the front at the end was stellar... Either Matthew or Will, maybe?
Christopher Scott choreographer. Good job, yo.
WITNEY AND CHEHON
Witney (no "h" which is weird) who can flower her tongue but scared of crickets. Chehon (key on) the Swiss ballet dancer. They'll be doing a samba routine choreographed by Louis Van Amstel.
Jump - The Cube Guys & Lucinana
She's in pink. His shirt is unbuttoned like a Latin lovah. (say it with me.. Love ahhh)
She's too smiley. Music is better than the routine. In fact, this music in small doses is good, longer than that you need an aspirin. Chehon's leg flares are distracting me. That said, Chehon steals it. Hello Magic Mike Musical?
Judges babble about stuff.. Blah blah. Mary Murphy clearly borrowed her jewels from Van Cleef. Oh, and Kat is in something sparkly.
TIFFANY AND GEORGE
Tiffany has baby hands and a pet duck. George (George II thankyouverymuch) has a pet frog. I guess these two belong together. Time for a contemporary routine from my favorite choreographer Sonya Tayeh. It's all about looooove peeps.
Turning Page - Sleeping At Last
Holy crumb cakes, it's a Twilight song. Way to play into the audience Sonya. Too early in the competition for this routine. The dancers don't connect. We don't connect with them. It's gorgeous, but I don't believe it. Give that to me later in the season when I will cry.
Judges talk. I notice we didnt see how they were paired this season. They must be being nice. This is about choreographers and not dancers tonight. But if this is what is to come from Sonya, I'm on board.
JANAYA AND BRANDON
She wants to meet Shamus and hates Chucky. He speaks too fast. Something about pazzokis?
Napoleon and Tabitha hip hip. (Nattytabs) An alcoholism number, Tabitha is super preggo.
Take Care - Drake featuring Rihanna (an alcoholic if there ever was one)
Who is the boozer here? IDK? He's in a wife beater.. Just sayin. Janaya can't keep up. Okay, he kicks the bottle and chooses her. Whatevs.
Judges babble. I still think it would have been better if she was the alkie.
ALEXA AND DANIEL
Alexa barely made it through. She couldn't connect. She likes red lstick and puppies. Daniel is the ballet dance from SFO. He's ann Aussie... Yeah, we get it. Time for a jazz routine from Sean Cheesman. Will it be cheesey? I just don't know.
Hey Hey - Dennis Ferrer
They are in a box contraption. Helloooo Olivia Newton John pants! They look good together, same coloring and hair. Good music, but I feel like I'm at a froufrou dance club and they are the entertainment. Better song than dance number.
Judges .. I skipped through comments.
AMBER AND NICK
I'm not even going to comment. This is a bad match. Sassy black chick and flamboyant white kid, notsomuch. Oh snap, they got the dreaded Viennese waltz from Jason Gilkson. Yeeeeah, you are going home.
Knights in White Satin - Tina Arena
Wow, racist much? It's great and fluid, but no one is going to vote unless you are Amber or Nick's friend. Great lifts though.
Judges.. Skipped. The chick-fil-a commercial was more interesting.
AMELIA AND WILL
She's the Amelie want-a-be. Will is the dude I think I already dig. Except when he says UM. And they get a Nappytabs hiphop. It's about cats. Okay then.
The Lovecats - The Cure
She knows where to place her booty. Looks like he wants to sniff it. It's okay. Kinda.. Meh.
I'm going to skip Judges from here on out. It's stupid and sexually charged. NEXT!
JANELLE AND DAREIAN
She likes stuff, he does too. I'm bored. Let's dance. African something with the Cheese dude.
Jungle - Hilight Tribe
Remember in Can't Buy Me Love when the dude did the african mating dance ritual? It looked like that. But worse.
ELIANA AND CYRUS
Type Diorio, Broadway
Run and Tell That - Hairspray
Kneepads for ten seconds of choreography. Meh. Cyrus has ridic earring things happening. Nope, not voting for him.
AUDREY AND MATTHEW
Don't eff it up. They've got Travis Wall. So again, don't eff it up. It's a lovey Dovey piece on the Titanic. SO DON'T EFF IT UP!!!
Unchained Melody - The Righteous Brothers
Omg. Travis, 4rlz? That is so trite. Hubs even called the dive from the couch. That said, it was sexy. And Matthew is a mini Ryan Gosling. Chicks will vote for it like they read 50 Shades do Grey.
LINDSAY AND COLE
Another Jason routine with a Paso Doble.
Unstoppable - E.S. Posthumus
Hubs interjects he wants a dance routine with all Super Heroes. The fact is if your not first or last n the show, no one remembers you. Cole is not wearing a shirt cause he's a martial artist. Nuff said. Where were the lifts? Mary Murphy has an annoying voice.
The end. We shall see who gets cut. I'm thinking someone in the middle.